spare the rod spior the child right

In 2005 a policeman asked me, why did I think there was so much crime going on now a days? So I'll put it here for you all to see. A spanking is NOT abuse, neither is a whipping/whooping. Now an a** kicking or even getting at that behind while you are in a rage is just wrong! I'm not sure if it's when they invented CPS (child protective services)or what? But somewhere something went wrong. I'll tell you this don't tell me I can't spank my kids and then tell me you're going to hold me responsible for something they did. I'll tell you right now I'll be dropping them at your house so they can kick your a*$. You ever view a talkshow where the child is biting,pushing,hitting & kicking their parents behind? The kids walk out screaming f___you, shut up b____and things like that. Do you know why? Because that child knows if you put your hands on me I'm calling the police. That child feels like if they spare the rod on you, then you're going to get spoiled and think you can tell me what to do! Then you watch that same talkshow a few years later and that same family is back. But guess why now? Because the parents are now drug addicts, oh and their kids are in the strets robbing YOU! So tell me did you ever get a spanking? I guess those who said yes, would like to tell me how it tramatized you to? How you have low self-esteem and whatnots? One last question for those of you that got spankings and the whole 9 yards. Do or did you curse at your parents,do you rob and steal and do you use drugs? Hmmph, imagine that!!!

I think spanking being looked at as abuse is only necessary in extreme cases. No I do not think that a weapon should be able to be use nor excessive force is necessary. If you do not use spanking as a first resort when you do have to use it chances are you are going to hurt their ego more than actually hurting them and isn't that what we are going for. AS LONG as spanking is not done excessively nor with a weapon I see nothing wrong with it.

I do not think a Slap on the A hand or a slap on the butt is abuse. Yes if it is overdone or if a paddle or belt com into play then it can turn into abuse. But sometimes it is affective.... As i said before alternative forms of punishment or discipline should be used first.

We don't use spanking as an option to disapline our children but I sure want to many times. I did try it and found that in extreme cases when it seem to grab an histerical child attenttion. It sure made me feel terrible. I don't beleive that government needs to be involved. But spanking multiple times to me can be considered abuse.

Agreed. I also believe kids learn by example.
I have children with special needs and I know from personal experience that spanking does not work. Patience, talking with the child, natural consequences and love do work.

I think that part of setting an example is showing your children that you can resolve an issue without violence - and spanking is a form of violence. To me it should only be used in the most extreme circumstances, and not for older children.

if you hit you failed. the're a lot of way how to explain everything to kid. if it is the way to make him to do something you can switch a topic, it helps. they can't keep topic of "discussion" as adults can. just distract kids attention from "bad" subject...

I think that their is a place for spanking but if other forms of punishment should be tried first.

Spanking is demeaning after age 5 or so. If you can use another form of discipline (timeouts, putting a special toy in 'jug' (away), or, better yet, doing retribution, it would actually be a positive, learning experience. Didn't Kahil Gibran say 'Violence is the last refuge of the inept?' I find that my kids (& myself) often learn more from mistakes that just being good.

Agreed. For one of my 3 kids there were times when I felt it was the only way I could get their attention or make a point. Although, one of the low points of my parenting career was when I realized I was saying "no hitting" while spanking my child:-| I'm glad that I'm past that stage.